Having my two cents worth

Giving an opinion on world events and news…

The politically incorrect guide of getting through TSA security

This post is intended to be tongue in cheek. Last year I was in the USA for a short time and I am not sure if I will be returning for a short time next year. Keeping in mind the obnoxious manner in which the TSA is handling travellers, I have decided to slap together a politically incorrect guide in handling these incompetent boobs who decide to frisk and grope people who would never even dream of being terrorists. So here are my suggestions:

1. Consider wearing your speedos to go through airport security. Those budgie smugglers will give the TSA something to ogle.

2. Make sure you do not shower on the day that you are due to board a flight to go anywhere within the USA.  In that way your BO will get up their noses.

3. Foods to consider eating several hours before your flight: peanuts, baked beans, raw cabbage, cauliflower and broccoli. All of these are guaranteed to ensure that you will be able to pass some wind just as the TSA person bends down to grope at your crotch.

4. A can of Pepsi, Coke or similar beverage about an hour before heading to the airport will enhance the possibility of that build-up of internal wind.


You are invited to come up with your own ideas on how to make the members of the TSA feel as uncomfortable as possible.


2 responses to “The politically incorrect guide of getting through TSA security

  1. RoboMonkey November 25, 2010 at 9:17 am

    I thought of those; but doing anything smelly or unhygienic is also unfair to your fellow passengers once you get onto the plane.


    • Maggie November 25, 2010 at 9:31 am

      Yes, I know. I am flying on Saturday, from Canberra to Sydney. I assure you that I will not be using any of those hints.

      However, think about it… if all passengers on the flight were being smelly… no one would notice !! 🙂

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